This is the concluding part of how an African migrated to Canada and his experience in his first few years in Canada. If you missed them, you should read part 1 and part 2 before you continue. Part 1 focused on how to become a permanent resident in Canada. In part 2, you will learn about Dapo Bankole’s experience after arriving in Canada.
No one deserves to lose his job and no one deserves not to get a good professional job. Yes, no one deserves to lose a loved one to an accident or incurable disease. No one deserves to be under the weight of financial pressure. But it happens. It’s called life. And when it happens, what do you do? Burn bridges? Heck No! Give up? Not advised. Throw a pity party and invite others to mourn with you? Maybe, but I just suspect that strategy will work in your favor for a bit but not for long. If you stay there crying, you’ll just keep Kleenex in business at your own cost.
Like I said at the beginning of this write-up, my life story is still a work in progress. It’s not been smooth but it has been rewarding. When I decided to organize the first of the “Arise Calgary 2016” training workshop series, some people thought I was crazy. A “jobless” man trying to improve the lives of others around him? The external critics were even nothing compared with that inglorious voice in my head trying to shut me down or more appropriately bully me into canceling the event. “What gave you the authority to talk to people?”, “Who do you think you are these days?”, “Physician heal thyself!”, “Why do you think people will come listen to you?”, “What if you fail?”, “What if no one shows up?” and the attacks went on and on.
Refusing To Give Up
But I refused to listen because I was ready to make a fool of myself and fail while trying to be true to my heart and passion. Thankfully; aside from my mentors, I had a core team of people that believed in the dream and decided to join hands with me. I love helping people and I hate it when people give up. When I imagine the possibilities that could have been if someone had not given up, I feel a pain in my heart . like to inspire hope and it’s not because I am perfect. it’s because I have accepted my mortality and continue to rise above my imperfections in order to reach my goals.
According to Dale Carnegie,
“most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.”
That is a major secret to rising above limiting circumstances. I have taken time to share my experience in the hope that at least just one person will be able to make a better decision based on my experience.
Our Paths Are Different
My story does not have to be your story especially with the temporary job. So, feel free to decide the course of your own life and destiny. Whether you need to get the so called survival job or not is left to you. I can tell you at least four personally known friends in Calgary. And I mean personal friends who secured jobs (at least pending final interview) while still in their home countries. And they only landed to resume the roles. Was I cursed? No. Was I unlucky? Far from it! Was I unprepared professionally? I’d say No. Could it have been better? Probably yes. Could I have made better decisions? Possibly. Did I have to go through the so called survival jobs? Likely No but I did. We all have different paths.
Whether you should leave Canada, Calgary or your current city is your choice. My purpose for sharing a bit of my own story is to encourage even if it is only one person. You cannot afford to give up on life, on the Canadian dream or on your effort at restarting your career. I also want to give people different perspectives to the way they see things. You need to keep reminding yourself that everybody’s circumstance will be unique no matter how similar. And whether you believe in God or not, there is an invisible hand that influences the affairs of every man. Just be sensitive and sensible.
Like the holy writ says,
“in due season you will reap if you faint not.”
Neither I or anyone has the infallible blue print for succeeding here or anywhere else; you and whatever/whoever you believe in will decide that.
You May Lose Your Temper Sometimes
I remember losing my temper with my wife and kids sometimes due to the battles I was fighting. There were days I did not feel like talking to anyone. I just felt like packing my bag and leaving Canada. There were those times “I finally realized” how foolish I was for abandoning everything and taking the so called leap of faith. I fought both internal and external demons. I was so afraid to stay in touch with those people who warned me about pursuing that glamorous Canadian dream. The fear of hearing them say, “we told you so” kept me away from them.
There was a day I even overheard my son asking his mum, “why is dad always frowning?”. I felt morbid but acted like I did not hear that. My sadness multiplied. I couldn’t even tell my parents or in-laws back in Nigeria what I was going through. Whenever we talked on phone, I was always “fine”. I suspect they had an inkling that things were not that good but they just decided to quietly pray for us.
There was even a time we did not have money to pay our house rent. Thank God we had a Nigerian credit card on hand. So, we took cash out of it. What of the days when all we could do was buy a $10 gas into our van instead of the full tank that we certainly needed. I could go on and on but I am happy we fought our way through. And oh yes, there were those days when literally, I felt I would pass out due to overdose of super satisfaction!
Through it all, I give glory to God and I thank Him for the privilege to have gone through the experience that I went though before getting to where I am today. It was not easy and I am not where I see myself yet. My best story is yet to be written, it is still in the works. A lot will still happen and I am completely open to God. However He leads, I will follow but I will do my part and I will not resign to fate. Losing hope is not an option, I will continue to press forward. As I continue to pray and develop myself professionally, I will work hard and continue to give back to Calgary in various ways that I don’t need to mention here. I volunteer a lot and try to create opportunities for others too. I will continue to stay true to my family and involve them in all my decisions. They mean the world to me.
Your Life Journey Is A Story
Everyone has a story to tell and we won’t all take the same route. I know not everyone will be bold enough to tell the world how rough their beginning was or what things they still struggle with. I bet it’s more glamorous talking about the new seven-figure income, the promotion, the new posh car, the big house and other seemingly more dignifying accomplishments than share personal struggles and seeming failures.
But it is those less attractive stories that save lives and inspire hope. When shared, those stories put positive energy back into the society. Those stories of failures, struggles and triumph make the world feel warmer – especially in Canada :). In every glory, there is a story. I ask every reader to share their story with someone – you just never know who would need it. What’s your story?
Who Is Dapo Bankole?
Dapo Bankole, a Canadian citizen, is a passionate and thorough IT professional who enjoys solving business problems. He achieves this through the practice of business analysis, project management and digital marketing. Dapo works with business owners who are ready to scale their businesses profitably through an online medium. He is the President of Mopheth Systems Corp., an organization with a primary operating base in Calgary.